Friday, January 22, 2010

getting testy

Image from Christine Peterson, Test taker. Flickr.

Saturday morning, my twin sons shall be taking the SAT Test. They have been preparing for this test for quite some time and seem to feel pretty confident that they will do just fine. As a parent, it is hard to know exactly how much to push, prod and poke. "Have you anwered the question of the day today?" The words back to me that I hear are - "Stop, Mom." I can't say that I blame them. I mean really, who needs a nag or the drone of a troll. I mutter back, "getting testy?"

So to all you Moms and all your test takers, take a "deep breath" and know that these times will pass. It is normal during this time to have some heavy sighs, some nasty back-talk and some testy headed comments.

I am headed out to stock the pantry with snacks and make something good for dinner. Rewards are in order after a grueling test. How do you deal with testy heads? Sling back, re-coil or retreat?

20 comments:

A Gift Wrapped Life said...

We had one of those big exam days here last summer and I hope you have a good bottle of wine......you will all need it when all is said and done. Good luck to the boys! And to Mom too.

pve design said...

Sande-
I knew I should have consulted with you - yes a little glass of port of sherry might be just the thing for me, and a large milk-shake for each of the boys.
pve

ra said...

It sounds as if you are just starting the college process with your sons. I don't know if you have already been through it before with other older children, but I will offer this advice anyway. "Select an hour during the week during which you and your child (in your case, children) will discuss the status of the college application process. Outside of that time, do not speak of it." This advice was given to me by a friend with two children older than mine, and I am happy to report that it saved a lot of mental wear and tear on all of our parts - my son's, my daughter's, my husband's, and mine. Good luck to all of you!

pve design said...

ra-
thanks for the very smart advice. I think adding salt to any wound can only make matters worse. Yes, time limits are a great idea. Thanks again - and leave any wise or witty tips.
pve

ra said...

OK, one more tip. This is more for the sake of others than for you. You are going to be bombarded by questions about your sons' choices of colleges, and they will be likewise. By September of 2011 you will be sick of answering questions about where they have decided to attend. They will also be sick of being asked. So I've made my personal policy as follows: For the youth, I will ask them once in the fall of their senior year what they are thinking, and I will ask them after graduation where they are going. For their parents, I will follow the same pattern - one question in the fall, one question after graduation. If I can get the information from a third party (like the church youth advisor, or a church bulletin) I will even forego the questions.

Just sayin'

VictoriaArt said...

Oh, good luck with all that. Patience, patience with yourself and all...
You've got solid advise as I read the comments!

Enjoy this weekend, would love to get together next week?!

XX
Victoria

Acanthus and Acorn said...

Oh, I do not envy you, having just "survived" it myself! It starts with the SAT tests and before you know your knee deep in the application process. My oldest will be heading off to college in the fall. Now we get to breathe a bit and wait and hope that all the hard work pays off. Many good tips here as well as what you are already planning. Don't forget to send them out the door with fresh batteries for their calculators!:)

JMW said...

Good luck to your sons. I know tests like that add a level of stress for all members of the family. Sending positive vibes your way!

Mrs. Blandings said...

I try to retreat, but sometimes get in one last point. I wish I didn't.

Jeannine @ Small and Chic said...

Make sure they understand that their application is a puzzle. No piece of the puzzle overshadows another piece. A four hour exam doesn't change the piece that represents four years of academic work.

There's a reason students tend to do better the second time they sit for the SAT. The first time, they're anxious and they aren't familiar with the pace they need to set. The first time is just a dress rehearsal. Most schools are only interested in seeing the very best scores (we call it "superscoreing"), so if they don't do so well on one section this time, it's not the end of the world.

If you have questions, feel free to email me. I know a little more about this than the average person. :)

Marnie said...

retreat is the best for me

Belle (from Life of a...) said...

OH my...how well I remember the anxiety around the high stakes testing. SO stressful for the kids and parents. Our son never worried much about it but our daughter...OH MY GOODNESS...we had a time. All was fine in the end but she is such a worrier!

Summer is a Verb said...

Best of luck to the twins! Dying to hear what meal they reap...XXOO

Emily said...

I'm sometimes a sling-back, but trying to be less reactive and more wise with my reactions to my young children. I remember SATs - a good dinner by a loving mother is just the thing after an intense test like that. I hope all goes well and hang in there...you're a great mom!!!

Deidra said...

My tendency is to go overboard with worry so, instead of worrying I cook. I make delicious meals for the test takers to eat before the test, and yummy treats for after. And I pray.

Do you remember when you took the SAT? I remember that it wasn't such a big deal, so I'm sure we parents make more of it than it really is...

Kwana said...

I'm sure your boys did just wonderful They have worked so hard. Now it's my turn to get testy. I love all the advice.

style chronicle said...

I am not at the "testy" stage yet but I am sure it will be here before I know it. I am sure your boys did great!

Preppy 101 said...

Push in stages so that they don't even realize what you're doing ;-) I never harped on my children relentlessly. It just wouldn't have worked in our home. I usually waited for them to open the convo and then we talked about it as much as they wanted. And they will initiate the convo. I promise. i've been there. They will do fine cause they are fabulous just like you. I really mean that. I learned that whatever happens is for their own good in the big picture. Rejection is God's Protection. It all balances out. Trust me. xoxo

pve design said...

How amazingly wonderful are each of you and your wise tips! My test takers are certainly relieved to have that test behind them, now they just are anxious to learn of their respective scores.
We had many good chats about it and I loved hearing from them about the small and uncomfortable desk from which they sat for over 5 hours during the test.
pve

Laura @ the shorehouse. said...

Oh, I do not miss those SAT days! I swear I spent the entire school year prepping for that one test. Hope they did well! I am sure the best part for them is that it's over. :-)